Why Are Single Women Wrongly Called Out?

single women in Africa

By Justica Anima 

Women have mostly been made to take most of the blame in life for whatever situation they found themselves. If a girl was raped, the first question she is asked is why she went into the man’s room in the first place, or why she had to dress indecently. Most women’s problems are somewhat indirectly associated with their own misbehavior or insecurities. 

In the new research, published in the journal ‘Psychology of Women Quarterly’, two studies found that blaming sexual harassment victims is linked to empathy for male perpetrators. That’s right, men, in particular, are more likely to feel for the male harassers and blame the victim. 

On this premise, I recently took to my social media handle to pose the question, why are single women always the problem in society? Turns out I was not the only one thinking about this issue. Friends and acquittances sent in their various responses. Let me try to analyze a few of those responses. 

They have a sugar daddy 

Most often, single women beyond a certain age are accused of dating older married men. This assumption goes beyond the point of she already having her own means of attaining income or financial stability. One of the responses I got was that for a woman to be single while in her prime means that she is not ready for a commitment which also implies that she already has someone fueling her passion. In most situations, ladies with sugar daddies are seen to be ‘off the market’, even without a ring on their fingers. 

They wasted their youthful days 

Ladies, how true is this? How can one be tagged ‘wasted’ because they are single at an age when all their fellow women are getting married and starting families. Well, for some reason, people think single women must have wasted their hay days getting into the wrong relationships. For the sake of enlightenment, can we already get pass this notion? It is about time we let go of such wrong perceptions about women. They may just not be the lucky ones yet. 

They have high ambitions 

Okay, so this is the creepiest of all the comments I heard about single women. A male friend of mine actually took the courage to tell me that for a ‘traditional man’ as himself, he would have nothing to do with a lady who is over ambitious. To him, such women do not like to submit to their men. You could have imagined how the conversation ended that day. I had to school him on some of the benefits of dating highly ambitious women, some of which included, getting a lifetime supporter and financier.  

It about time we gave women room to be who or what they want to be, including being single for the rest of their lives and not having to feel bad about such life choices. 


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